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==Early life==
==Early life==
[[Image:Rivers Cuomo - 1978 School Picture.jpg|thumb|left|200px|Cuomo's 1978 school photo]]
[[Image:Rivers Cuomo - 1978 School Picture.jpg|thumb|left|200px|Cuomo's 1978 school photo]]
Rivers Cuomo was born on [[June 13]], 1970 in Manhattan to [[Frank Cuomo]], of Italian descent,<ref>Collinge, Miranda. "Rivers Cuomo" ''The Guardian''. 28 June 2008. https://www.theguardian.com/football/2008/jun/29/popandrock</ref> and [[Beverly Shoenberger]], of German-English descent. According to Rivers, his mother claims that he was so-named because she first heard the sound of a river outside her hospital window after his birth, while his father claims that Rivers was named after three soccer players from the [[Wikipedia:1970_FIFA_World_Cup|1970 FIFA World Cup]]: Brazilian player [[Wikipedia:Rivellino|Roberto Rivellino]], and Italian players [[Wikipedia:Gigi Riva|Gigi Riva]] and [[Wikipedia:Gianni Rivera|Gianni Rivera]].<ref name="acename">"his middle name..." Cuomo posting as "ace" on ''The Cuomo Board'', ca. 2002. https://web.archive.org/web/20110105082734/http://members.shaw.ca/ridd2/threads/riverscuomo/02-12-RCBOARD1.html</ref><ref>''The Kelly Clarkson Show'' "Brooke Shields/Weezer" (S5.E139) Air date: 15 May 2024.</ref> Shoenberger gave Rivers no middle name in order to permit him to choose his own (which he never did).<ref name="acename" /> Rivers was, according to his younger brother, [[Leaves Cuomo|Leaves]], almost named "Apple" (most likely because he was born in New York City).<ref name="riversedge">Luerssen, John D. ''Rivers' Edge: The Weezer Story''. 2004. ECW Press</ref><ref name="riversedge" />
Rivers Cuomo was born on [[June 13]], 1970 in Manhattan to [[Frank Cuomo]], of Italian descent,<ref>Collinge, Miranda. "Rivers Cuomo" ''The Guardian''. 28 June 2008. https://www.theguardian.com/football/2008/jun/29/popandrock</ref> and [[Beverly Shoenberger]], of German-English descent. According to Rivers, his mother claims that he was so-named because she first heard the sound of a river outside her hospital window after his birth, while his father claims that Rivers was named after three soccer players from the [[Wikipedia:1970_FIFA_World_Cup|1970 FIFA World Cup]]: Brazilian player [[Wikipedia:Rivellino|Roberto Rivellino]], and Italian players [[Wikipedia:Gigi Riva|Gigi Riva]] and [[Wikipedia:Gianni Rivera|Gianni Rivera]].<ref name="acename">"his middle name..." Cuomo posting as "ace" on ''The Cuomo Board'', ca. 2002. https://web.archive.org/web/20110105082734/http://members.shaw.ca/ridd2/threads/riverscuomo/02-12-RCBOARD1.html</ref><ref>''The Kelly Clarkson Show'' "Brooke Shields/Weezer" (S5.E139) Air date: 15 May 2024.</ref> Shoenberger gave Rivers no middle name in order to permit him to choose his own (which he never did).<ref name="acename" /> Rivers was, according to his younger brother, [[Leaves Cuomo|Leaves]], almost named "Apple" (most likely because he was born in New York City).<ref name="riversedge">Luerssen, John D. ''Rivers' Edge: The Weezer Story''. 2004. ECW Press</ref>


Rivers lived the first few years of his life at the [[Wikipedia:Rochester Zen Center|Rochester Zen Center]] in upstate New York, where his parents first met.<ref name="yogamag">"Music and Spirituality: A Real Connection" ''Integral Yoga Magazine''. https://integralyogamagazine.org/music-and-spirituality-a-real-connection/</ref> Frank Cuomo was a musician who notably played percussion on the 1971 album ''[[Wikipedia:Odyssey of Iska|Odyssey of Iska]]'' by jazz saxophonist [[Wikipedia:Wayne Shorter|Wayne Shorter]]. Frank left the family when Rivers was four years old, and was largely absent from Rivers' youth. Shoenberger moved with Rivers and Leaves to [[Yogaville]] East in Pomfret, Connecticut, where they lived until 1981.<ref name="yogamag" /> Shoenberger married [[Steven Kitts]] in 1976. At Yogaville, Rivers was given the name Rama by the Indian guru [[Swami Satchidananda]].<ref>Archived journal posts by rivers-words: https://rivers-words.livejournal.com/</ref> When Yogaville relocated to Virginia, the Kitts family remained in Connecticut, moving to Storrs/Mansfield area, where Cuomo lived for the remainder of his adolescence.<ref>"Mansfield" ''[[Riverpedia]]''. https://books-r-fun.herokuapp.com/wiki/Mansfield</ref>
Rivers lived the first few years of his life at the [[Wikipedia:Rochester Zen Center|Rochester Zen Center]] in upstate New York, where his parents first met.<ref name="yogamag">"Music and Spirituality: A Real Connection" ''Integral Yoga Magazine''. https://integralyogamagazine.org/music-and-spirituality-a-real-connection/</ref> Frank Cuomo was a musician who notably played percussion on the 1971 album ''[[Wikipedia:Odyssey of Iska|Odyssey of Iska]]'' by jazz saxophonist [[Wikipedia:Wayne Shorter|Wayne Shorter]]. Frank left the family when Rivers was four years old, and was largely absent from Rivers' youth. Shoenberger moved with Rivers and Leaves to [[Yogaville]] East in Pomfret, Connecticut, where they lived until 1981.<ref name="yogamag" /> Shoenberger married [[Steven Kitts]] in 1976. At Yogaville, Rivers was given the name Rama by the Indian guru [[Swami Satchidananda]].<ref>Archived journal posts by rivers-words: https://rivers-words.livejournal.com/</ref> When Yogaville relocated to Virginia, the Kitts family remained in Connecticut, moving to Storrs/Mansfield area, where Cuomo lived for the remainder of his adolescence.<ref>"Mansfield" ''[[Riverpedia]]''. https://books-r-fun.herokuapp.com/wiki/Mansfield</ref>
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Cuomo initially intended to return to Harvard for the fall semester of 1997, but decided not to at the last minute.<ref name="harvardcrimsondc">Riesman, Abe J. "Rivers' End: The Director's Cut" ''The Harvard Crimson''. 26 April 2006. https://www.thecrimson.com/article/2006/4/26/rivers-end-the-directors-cut-the/</ref><ref name="weezine11">Koch, Karl. ''[[Weezine]]'' Issue [[Weezine Issue 11 - Fall 1997|#11 - Fall 1997]]</ref> Cuomo instead focused on songwriting again, in addition to performing shows with friends in the Boston music scene.<ref name="weezine11" /> Cuomo fronted a handful of small-venue concerts to try out new material and audition potential new bassists for Weezer following the departure of [[Matt Sharp]], experimenting with both "goofball"<ref name="weezine11" /> songs (under the moniker "[[Homie]]") that didn't fit with the darker, more personal songs of ''Pinkerton'', as well as minimalist, "drone rock" compositions utilizing as few chords as possible (a reaction to the negative response to ''Pinkerton'', which featured numerous chords and key changes).<ref>"Lovely" ''[[Riverpedia]]''. https://books-r-fun.herokuapp.com/wiki/Lovely</ref>
Cuomo initially intended to return to Harvard for the fall semester of 1997, but decided not to at the last minute.<ref name="harvardcrimsondc">Riesman, Abe J. "Rivers' End: The Director's Cut" ''The Harvard Crimson''. 26 April 2006. https://www.thecrimson.com/article/2006/4/26/rivers-end-the-directors-cut-the/</ref><ref name="weezine11">Koch, Karl. ''[[Weezine]]'' Issue [[Weezine Issue 11 - Fall 1997|#11 - Fall 1997]]</ref> Cuomo instead focused on songwriting again, in addition to performing shows with friends in the Boston music scene.<ref name="weezine11" /> Cuomo fronted a handful of small-venue concerts to try out new material and audition potential new bassists for Weezer following the departure of [[Matt Sharp]], experimenting with both "goofball"<ref name="weezine11" /> songs (under the moniker "[[Homie]]") that didn't fit with the darker, more personal songs of ''Pinkerton'', as well as minimalist, "drone rock" compositions utilizing as few chords as possible (a reaction to the negative response to ''Pinkerton'', which featured numerous chords and key changes).<ref>"Lovely" ''[[Riverpedia]]''. https://books-r-fun.herokuapp.com/wiki/Lovely</ref>
===''The Green Album''===
===''The Green Album'' and ''Maladroit''===
[[Image:Essay 97-98 05.jpg|left|thumb|200px|Mikey Welsh and Cuomo, 1998]]Cuomo ultimately selected bassist [[Mikey Welsh]] to join Weezer, and the two moved into a townhouse at Park La Brea in Los Angeles with Pat Wilson.<ref>Mikey Welsh [[Facebook posts by Mikey Welsh|Facebook post]]. Original link: https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=10150292201982717</ref><ref name="wpqa042024">[[Weezerpedia Discord Q&A with Karl Koch - April 2023]]</ref> Weezer resumed rehearsals, primarily at [[TK demos|T.K. Rehearsals]] in Los Angeles.<ref name="rechist10">[[Recording History - Page 10|Weezer Recording History - Page 10]]</ref> Cuomo and Welsh later moved into an apartment on Sepulveda Boulevard. By the beginning of 1999, however, Cuomo had failed to write any material in which he felt confidence.<ref name="aloneiilinernotes">''[[Alone II: The Home Recordings of Rivers Cuomo]]'' [[Alone II liner notes|liner notes]]</ref> "My band-mates each were pursuing other projects." Cuomo reflected in [[2008]], "Weezer's manager and record company rep stopped calling me regularly. Friends and family grew distant. I encouraged the space so that I could be alone. I determined that with enough concentration and effort, I could analyze my way out of the predicament I imagined myself to be in, the predicament of 'poor songwriting'." Cuomo began an analytical process of regarding his songwriting sessions as "experiments," assigning each a number and maintaining a log dubbed "[[The Catalog o' Riffs]]." "I analyzed a large number of writing methods, varying what seemed to be every possible facet of the process: the order of the steps (guitar, melody, lyric, beat, riff, etc.); the tempo; the feel; the level of distortion on the guitar; whether I was composing aloud or in my head; the time of day; my emotional state; whether I had eaten or not; the number of drinks I had imbibed, if any. My goal was to ascertain the one method by which I could write the best songs."<ref name="aloneiilinernotes /> Meanwhile, he unplugged his phone, painted the walls and ceiling of his apartment bedroom [[Alone VI: The Black Room|black]] and covered the windows with fiberglass insulation.<ref>Rockland, Kate. "Student With a Past" ''The New York Times'' 16 February 2006. https://www.nytimes.com/2006/02/16/garden/16weezer.html</ref><ref name="olderandweezer">Brunner, Rob. "Older & Weezer" ''Entertainment Weekly''. 25 May 2001. ([[Entertainment Weekly interview with Rivers Cuomo - May 25, 2001|Transcript]])</ref><ref name="whativebeenupto">Cuomo, Rivers. "[[What I've Been Up to Since I Left School]]" Essay. 2004.</ref> He began studying and dissecting the songs of the bands [[Nirvana]], [[Oasis]], and [[Green Day]], assembling his studies into a three-ring binder he called "[[The Encyclopedia of Pop]]," in hopes of discovering a formula for writing pop songs.<ref name="eliscucode">Eliscu, Jenny. "How the Weezer frontman cracked the code of the perfect song" ''Rolling Stone'', Issue 898. 20 June 2002. https://web.archive.org/web/20070310202917/http://www.rollingstone.com/news/story/5933454/rivers_cuomos_encyclopedia_of_pop ([[Rolling Stone article - June 20, 2002|Transcript]])</ref> By late summer of 1999, Cuomo felt despondent in his efforts and briefly considered returning to school, but missed the registration deadline.<ref name="whativebeenupto" /> Weezer performed secret shows during this time—under the pseudonym "[[Goat Punishment]]"—wherein the band (sans Pat Wilson) covered songs from Nirvana and Oasis' respective debut albums.  
[[Image:Essay 97-98 05.jpg|left|thumb|200px|Mikey Welsh and Cuomo, 1998]]Cuomo ultimately selected bassist [[Mikey Welsh]] to join Weezer, and the two moved into a townhouse at Park La Brea in Los Angeles with Pat Wilson.<ref>Mikey Welsh [[Facebook posts by Mikey Welsh|Facebook post]]. Original link: https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=10150292201982717</ref><ref name="wpqa042024">[[Weezerpedia Discord Q&A with Karl Koch - April 2023]]</ref> Weezer resumed rehearsals, primarily at [[TK demos|T.K. Rehearsals]] in Los Angeles.<ref name="rechist10">[[Recording History - Page 10|Weezer Recording History - Page 10]]</ref> Cuomo and Welsh later moved into an apartment on Sepulveda Boulevard. By the beginning of 1999, however, Cuomo had failed to write any material in which he felt confidence.<ref name="aloneiilinernotes">''[[Alone II: The Home Recordings of Rivers Cuomo]]'' [[Alone II liner notes|liner notes]]</ref> "My band-mates each were pursuing other projects." Cuomo reflected in [[2008]], "Weezer's manager and record company rep stopped calling me regularly. Friends and family grew distant. I encouraged the space so that I could be alone. I determined that with enough concentration and effort, I could analyze my way out of the predicament I imagined myself to be in, the predicament of 'poor songwriting'." Cuomo began an analytical process of regarding his songwriting sessions as "experiments," assigning each a number and maintaining a log dubbed "[[The Catalog o' Riffs]]." "I analyzed a large number of writing methods, varying what seemed to be every possible facet of the process: the order of the steps (guitar, melody, lyric, beat, riff, etc.); the tempo; the feel; the level of distortion on the guitar; whether I was composing aloud or in my head; the time of day; my emotional state; whether I had eaten or not; the number of drinks I had imbibed, if any. My goal was to ascertain the one method by which I could write the best songs."<ref name="aloneiilinernotes /> Meanwhile, he unplugged his phone, painted the walls and ceiling of his apartment bedroom [[Alone VI: The Black Room|black]] and covered the windows with fiberglass insulation.<ref>Rockland, Kate. "Student With a Past" ''The New York Times'' 16 February 2006. https://www.nytimes.com/2006/02/16/garden/16weezer.html</ref><ref name="olderandweezer">Brunner, Rob. "Older & Weezer" ''Entertainment Weekly''. 25 May 2001. ([[Entertainment Weekly interview with Rivers Cuomo - May 25, 2001|Transcript]])</ref><ref name="whativebeenupto">Cuomo, Rivers. "[[What I've Been Up to Since I Left School]]" Essay. 2004.</ref> He began studying and dissecting the songs of the bands [[Nirvana]], [[Oasis]], and [[Green Day]], assembling his studies into a three-ring binder he called "[[The Encyclopedia of Pop]]," in hopes of discovering a formula for writing pop songs.<ref name="eliscucode">Eliscu, Jenny. "How the Weezer frontman cracked the code of the perfect song" ''Rolling Stone'', Issue 898. 20 June 2002. https://web.archive.org/web/20070310202917/http://www.rollingstone.com/news/story/5933454/rivers_cuomos_encyclopedia_of_pop ([[Rolling Stone article - June 20, 2002|Transcript]])</ref> By late summer of 1999, Cuomo felt despondent in his efforts and briefly considered returning to school, but missed the registration deadline.<ref name="whativebeenupto" /> Weezer performed secret shows during this time—under the pseudonym "[[Goat Punishment]]"—wherein the band (sans Pat Wilson) covered songs from Nirvana and Oasis' respective debut albums.  


[[Image:Karlscorner-20001228-c.jpg|right|thumb|250px|Cuomo during recording sessions for ''The Green Album'']]In December of [[1999]], Cuomo moved into [[6145 Rodgerton Dr.|a house]] and built a rehearsal studio in the garage.<ref name="wpqa042024" /> In June of 2000, Weezer performed a number of shows at smaller venues under their own name before joining the [[Vans Warped Tour]]. The band continued playing concerts and rehearsing throughout the remainder of the year while Cuomo continued writing new songs.<ref name="rechist12">[[Recording History - Page 12|Weezer Recording History - Page 12]]</ref> From December through the following February, Weezer recorded their third record, the eponymous ''[[Weezer (The Green Album)|Green Album]]''. In contrast to earlier albums, Cuomo largely eschewed personal songwriting. "''The Green Album'' and ''[[Maladroit]]'' were, very intentionally, not about me." said Cuomo in 2006, "Not about what was going on in my life, at least in a conscious way." The lead single from ''Green'', "[[Hash Pipe]]," was reportedly written about a "homosexual transvestite prostitute"<ref name="olderandweezer" /> during one of Cuomo's "Catalog o' Riffs" experiments, wherein Cuomo chased Ritalin with three shots of tequila.<ref>"I Was a Scientist, This Was an Experiment" [[ITunes_Originals_band_commentary_-_2010#I_Was_a_Scientist.2C_This_Was_an_Experiment|iTunes Originals: Weezer]]</ref><ref name="eliscucode" /><ref>"Home Recordings From Weezer Frontman" ''Fresh Air with Terry Gross'', NPR. 22 January 2009. https://freshairarchive.org/guests/rivers-cuomo</ref> Conversely, however, songs like "[[O Girlfriend]]"<ref>Midwest Music Media "Weezer: O Girlfriend [Live - 1st time since 2002] - (Madison - June 14, 2023) - Indie Rock Road Trip" ''YouTube''. 15 June 2023. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rJ7fhy_S0_s</ref> and "[[Photograph]]" were written about real experiences.
[[Image:Karlscorner-20001228-c.jpg|right|thumb|250px|Cuomo during recording sessions for ''The Green Album'']]In December of [[1999]], Cuomo moved into [[6145 Rodgerton Dr.|a house]] and built a rehearsal studio in the garage.<ref name="wpqa042024" /> In June of 2000, Weezer performed a number of shows at smaller venues under their own name before joining the [[Vans Warped Tour]]. The band continued playing concerts and rehearsing throughout the remainder of the year while Cuomo continued writing new songs.<ref name="rechist12">[[Recording History - Page 12|Weezer Recording History - Page 12]]</ref> From December through the following February, Weezer recorded their third record, the eponymous ''[[Weezer (The Green Album)|Green Album]]''. In contrast to earlier albums, Cuomo largely eschewed personal songwriting. "''The Green Album'' and ''[[Maladroit]]'' were, very intentionally, not about me." said Cuomo in 2006, "Not about what was going on in my life, at least in a conscious way." The lead single from ''Green'', "[[Hash Pipe]]," was reportedly written about a "homosexual transvestite prostitute"<ref name="olderandweezer" /> during one of Cuomo's "Catalog o' Riffs" experiments, wherein Cuomo chased Ritalin with three shots of tequila.<ref>"I Was a Scientist, This Was an Experiment" [[ITunes_Originals_band_commentary_-_2010#I_Was_a_Scientist.2C_This_Was_an_Experiment|iTunes Originals: Weezer]]</ref><ref name="eliscucode" /><ref>"Home Recordings From Weezer Frontman" ''Fresh Air with Terry Gross'', NPR. 22 January 2009. https://freshairarchive.org/guests/rivers-cuomo</ref> Conversely, however, songs like "[[O Girlfriend]]"<ref>Midwest Music Media "Weezer: O Girlfriend [Live - 1st time since 2002] - (Madison - June 14, 2023) - Indie Rock Road Trip" ''YouTube''. 15 June 2023. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rJ7fhy_S0_s</ref> and "[[Photograph]]" were written about real experiences.


[[Image:Kerrang-april2002-weezer01.jpg|thumb|left|150px|Cuomo on the cover of ''Kerrang!'', 2002]]
Dissatisfied with his management, Cuomo sought to manage the band himself. He had dinner with [[Wikipedia:Fat Mike|Fat Mike]], frontman of the self-managed band [[Wikipedia:NOFX|NOFX]], who encouraged Cuomo not to pay someone a percentage.<ref name="riversedge" /> Immediately following the release of ''the Green Album'', Weezer fired their management, Atlas/Third Rail, and longtime manager [[Pat Magnarella]] (who subsequently sued).<ref>Pollack, Marc, and Simutis, David. "UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT: You Need A Scorecard To Keep Track, So We've Provided One" ''Hits Daily Double''. 3 July 2001. https://hitsdailydouble.com/news&id=274861&title=UNDER-NEW-MANAGEMENT</ref><ref>RIVERS CUOMO, an individual; PAT WILSON, an individual; BRIAN BELL, an individual; and MIKEY WELSH, an individual; collectively and professionally known as “WEEZER” vs. ATLAS/THIRD RAIL MANAGEMENT, INC., a California corporation; and PAT MAGNARELLA, an individual, https://www.dir.ca.gov/dlse/TAC/2001-21%20Rivers%20Cuomo%20et%20al%20v%20Atlas%20Third%20Rail%20mgmt%20inc.pdf</ref> According to [[Karl Koch]], the firing was a "statement of intent" and Cuomo felt that the band didn't need management, and could simply fund their next album with their own money and pay themselves back when the album sold.<ref name="vaultdive1">Weezer Fan Club Vault Dive #1 https://archive.org/details/wfc-vault-dive-1</ref> "I sought to cultivate the same ruthless practicality in my business that I had achieved in my music." Cuomo later reflected in an essay,<ref name="whativebeenupto" /> "I studied the lives of Napoleon and David Geffen, Machiavelli’s ''The Prince'', and contemporary texts on leadership and management. I gradually took over all of the business responsibilities from our manager and managed the band completely by myself. My performing, writing, and recording continued but were now joined by my business activities, all of which together I viewed as converging on the one goal of 'world domination'."
Dissatisfied with his management, Cuomo sought to manage the band himself. He had dinner with [[Wikipedia:Fat Mike|Fat Mike]], frontman of the self-managed band [[Wikipedia:NOFX|NOFX]], who encouraged Cuomo not to pay someone a percentage.<ref name="riversedge" /> Immediately following the release of ''the Green Album'', Weezer fired their management, Atlas/Third Rail, and longtime manager [[Pat Magnarella]] (who subsequently sued).<ref>Pollack, Marc, and Simutis, David. "UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT: You Need A Scorecard To Keep Track, So We've Provided One" ''Hits Daily Double''. 3 July 2001. https://hitsdailydouble.com/news&id=274861&title=UNDER-NEW-MANAGEMENT</ref><ref>RIVERS CUOMO, an individual; PAT WILSON, an individual; BRIAN BELL, an individual; and MIKEY WELSH, an individual; collectively and professionally known as “WEEZER” vs. ATLAS/THIRD RAIL MANAGEMENT, INC., a California corporation; and PAT MAGNARELLA, an individual, https://www.dir.ca.gov/dlse/TAC/2001-21%20Rivers%20Cuomo%20et%20al%20v%20Atlas%20Third%20Rail%20mgmt%20inc.pdf</ref> According to [[Karl Koch]], the firing was a "statement of intent" and Cuomo felt that the band didn't need management, and could simply fund their next album with their own money and pay themselves back when the album sold.<ref name="vaultdive1">Weezer Fan Club Vault Dive #1 https://archive.org/details/wfc-vault-dive-1</ref> "I sought to cultivate the same ruthless practicality in my business that I had achieved in my music." Cuomo later reflected in an essay,<ref name="whativebeenupto" /> "I studied the lives of Napoleon and David Geffen, Machiavelli’s ''The Prince'', and contemporary texts on leadership and management. I gradually took over all of the business responsibilities from our manager and managed the band completely by myself. My performing, writing, and recording continued but were now joined by my business activities, all of which together I viewed as converging on the one goal of 'world domination'."


Within weeks of the release of ''Green'', Weezer began recording new demos for the follow-up album. Cuomo shut out record label [[Geffen]] from the recording process, and the band financed and produced the record themselves, sharing in-progress recordings with fans online during studio sessions and sending CDs with finished songs to radio stations without the label's foreknowledge.<ref name="vaultdive1" /> Using this leverage, the band was able to renegotiate their contract, but the finished album, ''[[Maladroit]]'', under-performed, selling less than a million copies.
Within weeks of the release of ''Green'', Weezer began recording new demos for the follow-up album. Cuomo shut out record label [[Geffen]] from the recording process, and the band financed and produced the record themselves, sharing in-progress recordings with fans online during studio sessions and sending CDs with finished songs to radio stations without the label's foreknowledge.<ref name="vaultdive1" /> Using this leverage, the band was able to renegotiate their contract, but the finished album, ''[[Maladroit]]'', under-performed, selling less than a million copies.


===''Make Believe'' and discovering meditation===
{{Small quote box|[W]hen Hafiz says, “Self-Effacement is the emerald dagger you need to plunge deep into yourself upon this path to …God”, I read it as “Self-Effacement is the emerald dagger you need to plunge deep into yourself upon this path to Musical Creativity."|Rivers Cuomo, 2004<ref name="whativebeenupto" />}}Songwriting and demoing for Weezer's fifth album had begun before ''Maladroit'' had even been released, but plans were halted in the summer of [[2002]]. Soon after, producer [[Rick Rubin]] agreed to produce the record. The band continued demoing new songs, but wasn't pleased with the music he was making.<ref name="weirdworld">Grigoriadis, Vanessa. "Weezer's Weird World" ''Rolling Stone'' Issue 973. 5 May 2005. https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-news/rivers-cuomo-weezers-invisible-man-76590/</ref> Said drummer Pat Wilson, "He didn’t believe in the music, because he didn’t believe in himself [...] Didn’t matter how many times we said, 'That’s rad, Dude.' There were times he was physically ill coming out of the studio." Rubin, wanting to help Cuomo, gave him a copy of ''The Gift'', a book of poems by the fourteenth-century Sufi poet Hafez.<ref name="whativebeenupto" /> Hafez, who wrote hundreds of ghazals about different forms of love, led Cuomo to an epiphany: "If the feeling these mystics get in union with their God is analogous to the feeling I used to get in union with my music," Cuomo later reflected, "then their teachings for how to achieve their union should likewise serve to instruct me how to achieve my union." Cuomo subsequently sold his house and most of his possessions, moved into an empty apartment next to Rubin's house, and began volunteering six days a week at Project Angel Food in Hollywood, providing meals to people with HIV.<ref name="whativebeenupto" /> Although initially skeptical when Rubin suggested meditation, Cuomo found himself drawn to the technique of Vipassana.


[[Image:Sngoenka.jpg|thumb|right|200px|Cuomo with [[S.N. Goenka]] in [[2005]].]] The effect of meditation had an effect on Cuomo's songwriting. One song, "[[Pardon Me]]," was written after Cuomo attended a meditation course in which the teacher told him to repeat over in his mind "I seek pardon from all those who have harmed me in action, speech or thought."<ref name="weirdworld" /> Another song, "Hold Me", was written while fasting.