Paperface: Difference between revisions

[[Image:Amymoore.jpg|right|200px||thumb|Photo of Amy Moore from the liner notes for ''[[Alone II]]'']]

When I first read Brian Wilson's autobiography, ''Wouldn't It Be Nice'', in 1993, I strongly identified with the author's sense of self-doubt, creative struggles and passion for music. I particularly identified with his words, "My whole life, since I discovered music, has been about only one thing: about experiencing the sheer, pure, unencumbered, liberating happiness of the creative moment" (390). His words seemed to describe my life perfectly at the time. But now, fifteen years later, I see that my life has been about something else in addition to experiencing "the happiness of the creative moment." It's also been about learning how to achieve those creative moments. It's been about ''learning what to do''... and what not to do.

A year before I read Wilson's book, I had already postulated a few essential ingredients to a great song for me. A great song should have the aggressive performance style I had heard recently from the Pixies, Nirvana, and Sonic Youth. It should employ the soft-verse/loud-chorus song structure used in songs like "Gigantic" or "Teen Spirit." And it must have been a captivating lyrical subject.

My best friend Justin told me a juicy new rumor about Amy Moore, a classmate of ours from high school. Apparently, Amy had stolen a car, sped off to New Orleans and gotten herself arrested. I couldn't believe it: Amy was one of the sweetest–not to mention prettiest–girls in our class. The story sounded like it was straight off a Sonic Youth album cover. Whether any part of it was true or not¹, it stirred up some conflicting feelings in me. On the one hand, I wanted to live as Amy apparently had, following my impulses and blasting away at the feeling of in-authenticity in my life. On the other hand I wanted to live conservatively, to have a stable family and to keep my life structured so that I could get the most out of it. The conflict between my desires seemed to be the compelling subject I had needed, so I put it together along with the details of Amy's story in a song called '''"Paperface" (Track 14)'''.

<small>¹Recently, I corresponded with Amy via email and learned that she did steal a car, years ago, and she did drive the car to New Orleans but she never shot a cop and she gave the car away "to the first guy to beg a sandwich off me."</small>