Where's My Sex?

"Where's My Sex?"
Album track by Weezer
Album	Hurley
Released	September 14, 2010
Length	3:28
Label	Epitaph Records
Writer(s)	Rivers Cuomo, Greg Wells
Producer(s)	Rivers Cuomo, Shawn Everett
Status	Officially released
Stream	Error creating thumbnail: Unable to save thumbnail to destination Spotify
	Error creating thumbnail: Unable to save thumbnail to destination Apple Music
Hurley track listing
"Unspoken" (4) "Where's My Sex?" (5) "Run Away" (6)

"Where's My Sex?" is the fifth track on Hurley.

Appearances

• Hurley (2010)

Overview

I can’t remember now, if it was my two-year-old daughter that said it, or my wife said it, or my wife told me that my daughter said it — it was one of those three things. One of them accidentally said “Where’s my sex” instead of “Where’s my socks” — they couldn’t find their socks. And when I heard them say “Where’s my sex,” I just thought, “That’s a cool song title right there,” so I went and just started writing like crazy. And I wrote all the lyrics. First, I wrote it all about socks, like the song is all about trying to find your socks and how terrible it is when you’re not wearing socks. And then I just went back and changed a few letters in the word and it became a totally different animal.

—Rivers Cuomo, Spin interview, 2010

"Where's My Sex" was co-written by Rivers Cuomo with Canadian musician Greg Wells.

Personnel

• Rivers Cuomo — lead vocals, guitar
• Brian Bell — guitar, backing vocals, synth
• Scott Shriner — bass, backing vocals
• Patrick Wilson — drums
• Shawn Everett — producer
• Cameron Webb — additional recording
• Marc McClusky — mixing

Lyrics

Mom made my sex
She knitted it with her hands
Sex-making is a family tradition
Going back to the caveman days
They were walking around in a haze
Until they figured it out
And they said, “gosh dang, this is great!”
But now I’m like a prehistoric screwball
Walking 'round with no sex at all

I said
Where’s my sex? I thought it was here
Under the bench, but it isn’t there
I’ve got no idea where it disappeared to
I’m running late, I can’t be late
I can’t go out without my sex
It's cold outside and my toes get wet
And people will think that I’m an alien
Just cruising in to make a friend

Meg likes to hide it
She says that it gives her a kick
It may be under the rug
Or stuck in a shoe closet
Or tumbling 'round in the washing machine
She’s always trying to get me clean
She adds detergent and Bounce to eliminate static cling
It's gonna be another hour or more
Till I am ready to walk out the door

I said
Where’s my sex? I thought it was here
Under the bench, but it isn’t there
I’ve got no idea where it disappeared to
I’m running late, I can’t be late
I can’t go out without my sex
It's cold outside and my toes get wet
And people will think that I’m an alien
Just cruising in to make a friend

(Come on be my friend)

People can you hear me talking
I know you all are happy, rawking
Could you lend me a dime, pretty please?
Brother, sister got time? I've got no-
Sex on my feet, sex in my drawer
Sex in my shoes or sex on the floor

I said
Where’s my sex? I thought it was here
Under the bench, but it isn’t there
I’ve got no idea where it disappeared to
I’m running late, I can’t be late
I can’t go out without my sex
It's cold outside and my toes get wet
And people will think that I’m an alien
Just cruising in to make a friend

Known recordings

about this table

Performer(s)	Title	Filename	Date of recording	Recording location	Length	Appeared on	Notes
Rivers Cuomo	Where's My Sex?	Where's My Sex.2.mp3	2006—2010
Weezer	Where's My Sex?		2010	Zeitgeist Studios, Los Angeles, CA Red Bull Studios, Santa Monica, CA The Village, Los Angeles, CA Threshold Sound & Vision, Santa Monica, CA Hurley Studios, Costa Mesa, CA	3:28	Hurley

See also

• List of Weezer songs
• List of Rivers Cuomo songs